Tag: x-men

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Ad Nauseam: Spider-man Magazine #8

Are you really here right now? You of all people? What are you doing here? 

It’s been 20 months since the last installment of Ad Nauseam! 

Can’t you see it’s over?! Its done. 

JUST WHEN YOU THOUGHT IT WAS SAFE. TO FEEL RELIEF…in classic comic book fashion…IT RETURNS…

Once again, it’s that special time where we crack open ancient remnants of “entertainment” from yesteryear and inspect the various capitalistic poisons found in between the stories of our favorite fabled heroes. Tooth rotting cereals? Archaic video games? Forgotten candy contests? BEHOLD: Welcome to another thrilling addition of Ad Nauseam! Why am I still doing this? I honestly couldn’t tell you! Excelsior! 

Tonight, we’re crawling inside Spider-man Magazine #8 released in December of 1994. 

Spider-man Magazine is an interesting little time capsule of the Wall Crawler’s storied history as it was published as a “companion” to the Spider-man Animated Series airing in November of 1994. The magazine ran for 19 issues (March 1994-March 1997) and was an amalgamation of everything that would appeal to a 6-11 year old of the 1990s: part comic book, part Zoobook, part Highlights complete with free trading cards and neat contests. It even featured the freakin’ X-Men.  

I found this particular issue tucked in between some “gaming” magazines at a used bookstore. Despite being a Spider-fan, I had no previous knowledge of this magazine but I’ll be darned if it didn’t still look as appealing as it did on the newsstand 30 years ago. This short lived magazine isn’t too difficult to find and doesn’t go for much. Unless you want the final 6 issues (which were only available through home delivery). Thumbing through Issue 5, I saw potential as its advertisements and layout stirred some personal recollections. It passed the “vibes” check as the kids say. 

Let’s channel December 1994. So turn off Garfield’s Christmas, put down that god-awful Tiger electronics handheld “game” Grandma bought you, chillax, and let’s swing into the advertised offerings of Spider-man Magazine #8. 

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Gargoyles 

Imagine turning the page and coming face-to-face with this ad. I may not have had money in 1994 but take all my pogs including my ninja star slammer and just feed me whatever this is. An absolutely chilling and beautiful illustration in its own right; I’ll do whatever “Gargoyles” tells me to do. Coming October 24th? You got it. I’ve marked it on my school planner. I’ll even pretend to be sick and take the day off. 

Of course this is for the debut of Gargoyles the animated series. 

You remember Gargoyles. You friggin’ do. Most adults of a certain age remember Gargoyles. Can you recall specifics? Maybe not. But the fact that this show was on air for a little over two years and it’s still something many recall decades later has to mean something, right? 

I’ll tell you what it means: It means Gargoyles was pretty badass. Do you see the advertisement up there? 

Gargoyles was essentially Disney’s answer to Batman The Animated Series. Dark, brooding, mature, and meticulous; it was a cartoon made as much for kids as it was for adults. Heck, it wasn’t a “cartoon”…it was an “animated series”. It was masterly animated, pushed the boundaries of episodic animated writing, and was able to be “mature” all while maintaining a rating for children and adults alike. The intro to the show alone makes me able to do, like, 100 pushups.  

While the show had a short run, it still spawned a comic book, toyline, and Sega Genesis game. Many in the animation industry have claimed Gargoyles as an inspiration and it even had its own convention that ran from 1997-2009. It was called The Gathering of The Gargoyles and the website is still live. If I was scheduled to work at a convention center during The Gathering of The Gargoyles I would probably bring a Pepsi bottle of holy water and keep a crossbow in my trunk. 

There have been talks of a live action movie and “reboot” for years now, but I always find Gargoyles pretty special as it’s been untouched since its original purpose. It ruled the night for a couple years. The sun rose on their time and they returned to stone. They never overstayed their welcome. And they’ll be remembered fondly. And in today’s reboot/remake/recast culture, I think that’s pretty admirable. 

Power Rangers Power Pak

I’m always going to be open with you: This advertisement is the reason I purchased this issue. I mean, there’s some cool stuff advertised here but this? This is the nostalgic g-spot. For a mere $6.99 ($1.95 S+H) you could become the baddest kid on the playground. As you’ll realize with the following ads, The Power Rangers were peak popularity and merchandise gold by late 1994.  The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles craze faded and the Power Rangers took the preverbal power ball and morphed with it. Personally, at the time I was completely dedicated to all things MMPR. You recall that famous scene from Scarface where Tony Montana is sitting in his mansion surrounded by piles of cocaine and henchmen? I was like that, except in a midwest trailer park with Power Ranger junk and Mondo. Almost the same. Basically. 

The Power Pak consists of a small unconventional plastic “canteen”, a “just come out and admit its a” rape whistle, knockoff lightsaber consisting of the least popular colors, plastic telescope that a Power Ranger couldn’t use if they tried, and an identification badge if the rape whistle doesn’t work. Sure, it’s just a bunch of marked up dollar store toys, but that’s the shameless beauty of trends. This stuff sits on the shelf of the strip mall dollar store yet slap a Power Rangers decal on it and you’re sending away for it like a mighty morphin’ sucker. 

An ad like this is why I’ve been writing these articles for over 8 years. Wow that’s a bit humiliating when it’s written out. Throw in a pair of plastic electro-binoculars, a list of demented far-left opinions, and mark the price up 800% and you can call it a “Luke Skywalker” Power Pak.

Cap’n Crunch MMPR WristGame 

Hey guess what? No time for guessing it’s 1994 and the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers are inescapable. The masses have kicked those pesky Ninja Turtles to the curb and have found new (non-turtle) color-coded teenagers with attitude. And Captain Crunch is docking his ship to the Mighty Morphin’ Money train. 

There is so much going on in this illustration. I love it. It looks like a flyer for an underground punk show plastered on a telephone pole outside a dive bar. We’re assaulted with the Power Rangers “Computer Wrist Game” but also watch VR Troopers from Saban Entertainment and, oh by the way, eat Captain Crunch cereal too. Sugary Technicolor Capitalist Vomit that I would get tattooed on my damn gosh back!

Even 3 decades later, I’m still intrigued. There was a boy in my class that had a Mario Bros. game watch that I thought was pure illegal magic. This kid can play Mario? On his WRIST? AND HE CAN PLAY IT WHENEVER HE WANTS?! The idea of just firing up your favorite NES game during school secretly on your watch was fantasy to me…because of course it was. It was one of those crappy little LCD games that are essentially bedazzled smoke detectors. Barely resembling the title it claims to be that made you want it in the first place. And the “Power Rangers Computer Wrist Game” was no different. And I don’t even think it even tells you the (morphin’) time. An example of the idea being better than the execution. Yet, I have to admit, it looks radical. Take your $8.95, Crunch. Because wearing this unassuming colorful robot the size of a can of soda on my wrist will make me the talk-of-the-town (and also the biggest dork on the playground). 

Nabisco Marvel SuperSnack Tins

Reward children for eating cookies. What can go wrong? 

Clip those proofs-of-purchase off that Chips Ahoy or Oreo package and send it away for a Spider-man, X-Men, Iron Man, or Fantastic Four SUPERSNACK tin. I’ve actually used the Spider-man tin to collect my spare change for close to a decade without knowing where it came from. The mysterious magic of Ad Nauseam at play, folks! 

As a child, do you have a favorite memory of a Christmas or Birthday gift you received? You probably do. But what about promotional mailaway items? Okay, maybe not. Personally, I always thought these were the most rewarding “gifts” as a kid. Cutting out and collecting proofs of purchases, finding a stamp and envelope, gathering change for shipping. Finally, riding your bike to the mailbox and dropping that bad boy inside. You felt like you were “earning” something! And then the waiting game began. Remember, most of these things took 8-12 weeks for delivery. And, in kid time, that’s 3-6 years. So you completely forgot about it. 

You come home from a monotonous day of school and you’re told there’s a package for you. Strange. There’s, like, never mail for you…you’re a child. Then you feverishly pull apart the packaging, the memories of what the heck is in your hands warmly floods back, and the serotonin goes into overdrive. Behold! Your long awaited treasure turns your mundane day into an exciting one! 

I’ve had many Christmases and Birthdays with gifts that accompanied them. And I am grateful. Yet I can’t recall most of what I received in those days. Yet I can name the 5 mailaway promotions I took part in. Interestingly, If I received a Star Wars stamp set, Superman poster, or Indiana Jones flashlight as Christmas gifts I probably wouldn’t remember them. But because I “worked” for those particular things in question…at an age where money and responsibilities aren’t vast…I remember them 25+ years later and appreciate those objects a little more. Perhaps the lesson being earning things can feel more rewarding even leading to pride? Imagine that. Who says these articles have no redeeming qualities?  

Here’s the commercial for the Marvel SuperSnack Tins

X-Men Pogs At Target

Spider-man may have been on his way to Marvel’s quintessential superhero animated glory, but he wasn’t the first there…as the X-Men reigned supreme at this time. So much so that Spidey shared this very magazine with the X-Men. X-Men already had some pretty awesome promotions but this one in question being arguably the most overlooked: exclusive “caps” with your Target Kids Mutant Meal. “Caps” being a term for unofficial Pogs. It’s difficult to get any more 90’s than receiving X-Men “pogs” from a department store cafeteria. Maybe if Steve Urkel handed them to you I guess. 

I’ve been to a couple Targets that still have traces of a cafeteria (referred to as “Food Avenue” in this ad) though not as robust as they were 30 years ago. The point being these department stores were a place to spend the day; complete with daily sales and a place to get a hot meal. I spent an obnoxious amount of time in my local K-Mart as a kid complete with getting food at the “K-Cafe”. Pizza, burgers, sandwiches, popcorn, cotton candy, and Icees adorned the menu. I believe they even had breakfast options in the mornings. And frequenting K-Mart as often as I did, you couldn’t help but notice the “regulars”. The lonely single seniors with their paper and coffee. The downtrodden simply spending the day there. Teenagers taking advantage of the sitting space to read magazines without buying them. And, of course, the blue light specials over the intercom that kept many of them alert. These “cafes” bred a whole type of culture of its own. Not a “coffee shop” scene…but not quite a “homeless shelter” vibe either. It was somewhere right down the middle. And there’s been nothing quite like it. And I can’t say I miss it.  

It’s interesting to think the modern trend is being able to pick up items without even leaving your car. These “restaurant” sections shuttered over the last couple decades. What does that make of the lonely, the societal misfits, the aimless youth that inhabited it? Was it for the best? 

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Well, folks, that’s another Ad Nauseam for the books. Covering some interesting yet silly offerings found between the pages of a 30 year old Spider-man Magazine. A couple years back I was working on an Ad Nauseam installment when a coworker asked what I was doing. I answered, “I write about old advertisements found in comic books…” to which he simply and genuinely replied, “Why?”. I chuckled but the simple question really made me ponder on it for a bit. I recall that interaction whenever I write a new installation.  

This is the 17th installment of Ad Nauseam written over the course of 8 years. It doesn’t feel like it’s been that long. But I’m proud of these. It’s a way to wax nostalgic to myself about things that a very tiny number of people find interesting. It’s a great exercise of recollection, bad humor, and introspection published into the void of my website. There have been so many personal life changes over the course of those 8 years that sitting down to write these articles have become nostalgic in themselves. I recall different times that feel long ago when writing these articles that fill me with a specific warmth. The kind of warmth I felt when writing about these advertisements of simpler times. The act of writing about nostalgia has, in fact, now become nostalgic to me. It’s a great way to glance at the past, smile, and keep moving forward. 

You’ll always find “insight” into comfy comic culture here on ChrisDoesComics. “Why?” 

Why not?

Oh, and below are the trading cards that came with my magazine. 

I’ll see yuh when I see yuh…

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Ad Nauseam: Ultimate Spider-man #4

You’re not going to believe this, but, it seems there’s been a sort of mishap in regards to the current edition of Ad Nauseum. We’re not heading back to the 1990s to reminisce in the murky nostalgic mirth of discontinued candy, cereal, and action figures. No, my friends, for it is a new millennium! With Y2K upon us, I hope you’ve unplugged your computer…hid your savings under the mattress…and sent your Furby back to the circle of hell from whence it came. Because we’re swinging into Ultimate Spider-man #4 released February 2001! 

Marvel Comic’s line of Ultimate titles were “reboots” of some of their most iconic characters. The idea was to gain a new generation of readers with a clean slate. Gone were the high issue counts and 40+ daunting years of extensive history. With a new millennium comes a fresh (yet familiar) contemporary beginning. 

Straight from my own personal collection, Ultimate Spider-man came at a crossroads in my life. An awkward age where I was deemed “too old” for comics and toys by family and peers. Yet too young to work, drive, and dip my toe into the “adult” multiverse. So reading a modern take about the adventures of a 15 year old Spider-man couldn’t have come at a better time in my life. 

So put on your fuzzy bucket hat, fold up your Razor Scooter, and sign onto MSN because it’s time to read about the mindless capitalistic trash offered in between the pages of Spidey’s webtastic adventures!

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X-Men: Evolution Backpack Clips! 

I’ve spent more time than I care to admit writing about X-Men fast food toys. C’est la vie. While always prominent amongst the comic crowd, X-Men were the comic cash cow in 2001 as their first blockbuster movie debuted just 7 months prior. With a sequel in the works and a brand new animated series airing, it was only a matter of time before Wolverine found himself in the bottom of a greasy paper bag once more.  

I can’t recall much of X-Men: Evolution other than it imagined the characters as (mostly) teenagers and didn’t have an earbug of a title theme. Thinking it was a step down from the prior X-Men series, I mostly ignored it. But I wish I hadn’t ignored these X-Tacular keychains. I was imagining which one I would want most, yet they all look X-Mazing in their own individual X-ways. Cyclops launches little X-Men logos (Don’t we all?), Pull a string to “spark” Storm’s eyes, Wolverine pops his claws, Toad shows some tongue action, and Mystique’s face “morphs” using those old bean-like slimes. The mutant action features are surprisingly clever and creative for something that X-clusively comes alongside a crushed greasy bag of cinnamon twists. I truly regret not having one of these dangling from my Chicago Bulls backpack. These days, I would buy a set on eBay to attach to my work bag, but I’m already in a committed relationship and don’t want more women falling in love with me. 

What’s It Worth @ WizardWorld.com!

I’ve covered Wizard World before yet find it difficult to not wax nostalgic about it when it naturally pops up in other Ad Nauseams. The context of “What’s It Worth?” was, simply, an online price guide for your nerd junk. By that I mean comics get your mind out of the gutter. Pre-internet you’d have to purchase expensive price guides (the newer volumes the more accurate) for comics, toys, and everything in between. I remember thumbing through a relative’s Star Wars action figure price guide sometime around 1997 and being awe-struck that such a thing even existed. “Wait, adults buy toys for themselves?” I thought. “And they keep them in the box?”.

It was like a dork version of The Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come paying me a visit…but revealing a vision of lonely virginity instead of my tombstone.

The internet changed the game, once again, by having up-to-the-minute price guides. Pull up your long box of comics and start adding everything up right then and there with a guide everyone can universally reference. That radically shakes up the collectors market, does it not? Nowadays, Wizard World is just an overpriced celebrity meet and greet. But, boy, do I miss what it used to be. Not only offering great traveling comic conventions and an awesome monthly magazine but easing right into the new millennium by creating a great online resource for collectors alike. Wizard was a true nerd mecca. But I suppose all empires fall eventually. Especially ones built around Spawn posters and Witchblade trading cards. 

I’d lastly like to note that ever since Universal Studio’s Harry Potter Theme Park opened, it’s been nearly impossible to find old information on Wizard World conventions and magazines. It feels like someone else’s childhood was literally paved over mine. I hope you’re happy, Rowling.   

Hey You, Pikachu! On Nintendo 64 

Nintendo always strives to do the impossible. They’ve made a stout hairy middle aged Italian American Plumber cute. And they’ve always been innovators within the world of video games. Hey You, Pikachu! was a prime example of just that. Was it good? No, not really. Was it fun? For a few minutes I suppose. Did anyone really want this type of Pokemon game? Not at all. Where was I going with this? Oh. Voice recognition. Nintendo created a special microphone that attached to your controller specifically for this game. And you used it to “talk” to Pikachu. That’s it. That was the game. 

Problem being a lot of “older” kids will blindly lop up any Pokemon game. And this was a pet simulator (of sorts) aimed at children under 10. At the time, I was getting out of the Poke-craze. The card game got too simplistic for me. The Gameboy games began to feel redundant. I didn’t want to take pictures of Pokemon. I didn’t want to talk to Pokemon. I wanted them to fight until they were no longer conscious. For I was a 13 year old boy afterall. So I felt, as did most of my peers, that Hey You, Pikachu! was for (excuse my language) Barney-loving-diaper-babies.

I actually talked to this game not too long ago. The voice recognition doesn’t really work. You can honestly say whatever you want to Pikachu and the game just plays out. I remember simply naming household objects to him to “strengthen our friendship”. We literally became besties when I rattled off my kitchen appliances. Do I recommend it to Pokemon fans and/or vintage gamers? Well, if you’re into making a yellow bunny rabbit sad by repeating “Ninja Blender Pro”, then this is the game for you. Other than that, it was an innovative yet failed experiment. But, hey, now you’ve seen the advertisement for it.  

Activision’s Spider-man Video Game

Alright, now we’re talking. 

At this point in time, Spidey wasn’t so lucky in the video game category. I personally can only recall Super Nintendo’s Maximum Carnage being a bright spot, but even that was just a side scrolling beat ‘em up. We had yet to have a game that made you feel like Spider-man. Enter Activision’s aptly titled Spider-man released in late summer of 2000. This video game was a Marvel Comic come-to-life and personally took my Spider-fandom to the next level. Video game puns. 

It felt like a three dimensional continuation of the 1994’s Spider-man animated series. With brilliant voiceovers, fun colorful cutscenes, tons of Marvel cameos, inside jokes, and unlockables all webbed together and narrated by Stan “The Man” Lee himself. I rented this game numerous times and eventually purchased it as a “Playstation Greatest Hit”. You can actually swing and climb walls in a 3D environment! You can hear Spidey’s constant quips! It realized an iconic character in three dimensions with a story crafted with care and sealed in a video game package that seemed to be made for fans by fans. And it was the talk of recess for quite some time. The strategies, secrets, cheat codes, and easter eggs. It felt like a fully realized world full of web spinning adventure. I often credit this game with kicking off a slow-burn Spider-mania which led to the Spider-man movie in 2002. Sure, that all could’ve been in my head. But the game was a huge hit critically and financially. And I believe that may have turned the right heads to get Spidey on the big screen. 

2000’s Spider-man is always a “must own” no matter what point I’ll be in my life. So seeing this ad in this comic? It made me realize why Spider-man is such a special character to me. So much good spider-stuff coming together and hitting me all at the right time. 

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Oops, I did it again. But this time we ventured into a new millennium! And would you look at that? My toaster didn’t chase me. My bank account didn’t vanish. The local Radioshack didn’t take over the neighborhood as emperor. The world is still here! And it’s very possible that we’ll return between the pages once more…someday. But I’m feeling a bit homesick. And I know there’s a 1992 issue of W.I.L.D.C.A.T.S  out there with advertisements practically screaming to be released into the cataclysmic void of my website. 

I hope you enjoyed reading about the 20 year old comic book ads found in Ultimate Spider-man #4. Wait…Did you know that 2001 was twenty years ago? Weren’t the 1980s twenty years ago? When did they change this? Wow. Hold me in your cyber arms, friend, this is getting scary. 

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Ad Nauseam: Night Thrasher #4

Oh, hey there, I didn’t see you come in. What’s that? Oh, I was just thumbing through my eighteen issues of Night Thrasher comic books. “Who” you ask? Ah, well Night Thrasher is basically Batman without cool villains but makes up for it by riding a skateboard. Now I’m going to talk about the advertisements in this particular 27 year old issue. I do this semi-regularly. 

Hey, where are you going? You just got here! Why don’t you get comfortable and stay for a while. I have sweet tea in the fridge. 

NIGHT THRASHER #4/ NOVEMBER 1993

Tonight we’re looking in between the action of Marvel’s Night Thrasher #4 released in November of 1993. We’re going to hit all the nostalgic topics you’d expect: defunct toy stores, bad video games, and fast food tie-ins! What’s that? Why am I doing this? Well…why don’t buses have seatbelts? Why doesn’t McDonald’s sell hot dogs? Why is he called The “Lone” Ranger if he always has Tonto with him?

“Defensive”, you say? Well, kiddo, I only have one thing to say to you: Remember Seaquest?

seaQuest DSV!

First of all, DSV stands for Deep Submergence Vehicle. Glad that’s out of the way. Anywho, Seaquest (I’m typing it like this from now on) was a television show that ran for 3 seasons from 1993 to 1996. It took place in the scientific super-future of 2018 and was basically underwater Star Trek. It starred Roy Scheider (of Jaws fame) adding to my theory that he was clearly some sort of amphibious man-fish that needed quick access to salt water at all times. 

I included this ad as it was something I haven’t given a single solitary shred of thought since I last “watched” it. Seaquest, alongside Stargate SG-1, provided involuntary background noise that polluted the backroom of my grandfather’s currency exchange during my summer break days. I couldn’t tell you if this show was good or not (research shows it was popular for a hot second) but boy did it seem boring to an 11 year old. Apparently not even Darwin, Seaquest DSV’s genius talking Dolphin, could keep my attention for a full episode. And Darwin was mentioned so matter-of-factly on the wikipedia page that I had to do a double take. 

Nowadays Seaquest is some sort of aquatic zoo franchise throughout the US where you can book corporate events and birthday parties to touch otters and curse stingrays for taking Steve Irwin from us. Regardless of what Seaquest DSV means to people, it’ll always be sleepy television droning to me. Beats All My Children though. 

That last sentence sounds kinda dark. 

KayBee Toy Stores Ghost Rider Deal!

I’d like to point out that this issue of Night Thrasher stops dead in its tracks for a TWELVE PAGE ad for Ghost Rider’s comics and coupon deal. If anything, I’d say Night Thrasher himself acts as a mere husk for the Spirit of Vengeance and his aggressive marketing. It was around this time that Marvel paraded Ghost Rider quite a bit. Besides his main comic title, he was featured in SEVEN others! Not to mention his own toyline. So why was Marvel suddenly pushing the decades old Ghost Rider, you ask? SPAWN. Todd Mcfarlane’s series was the hottest comic on the planet. This new indie creation about a human unwillingly bonded with a demonic force under “Satan’s” power? Heck, that sounds like Ghost Rider. Well, that’s what Marvel thought too. And that’s why ‘ol Flamehead was everywhere in the mid 1990s. 

The ad featured is for a H O T D E A L in which you can bring the attached coupon into a KayBee toy store and get $5 off any Super Nintendo or Sega Genesis (when I was dead broke, man, I couldn’t picture this) game cartridge PLUS a Ghost Rider collectors comic issue! The combination of Ghost Rider swingin’ his chain near a Street Fighter II SNES box all below the KayBee Toys logo promotes this ad to the MEGA 90S NOSTALGIA HALL OF FAME. If there was some sort of physical shrine to my childhood memories…it would all be encompassed inside of a KayBee toy store. 

Till this day, if I’m visiting my childhood mall, I’ll always glance and visibly frown where the KayBee toy store used to be. I can recall the sound of electronic toys chirping ,grinding, performing on display as you walked in. Stepping onto that dirty royal blue carpeting stained from sugary Icee spills. Surrounded from floor to ceiling with various boxed toy trends spanning multiple eras. KayBee never got rid of anything. Employees just caked on those tiny white and red price stickers until the toy was basically free. I can place the three claustrophobic aisles leading to the back wall where you’d nearly be squashed by towering Care Bears and other assorted plush. Shuffling up to the cashier with your purchase, the entire counter area was littered with assorted candy, gags, keychains, and trading cards stacked at eye level for one last impulse purchase. I’d eagerly glance behind the cashier at the carefully lined wall of video game cartridges sitting in those hefty plastic cases. Scanning for suggestions I can rattle off for my birthday or Christmas. Man. What a vibe. I’m there, y’know? 

Pizza Hut X-Men Pizza Packs!

Pizza Hut has pizza with all the X-TRAS this ad boldly claims in an eye-catching two page spread that I would have framed hanging above my roaring fireplace. In my deep (dish) personal (pan) opinion, Pizza Hut was never the place to go for tie-in trinkets. Yet when they wanted to, Pizza Hut truly delivered (not only pizza) but some awesome X-TRAS as illustrated here. X-Men were as hot as the mozzarella on your slice with an awesome cartoon, toyline, and rebooted (sorta) comic series. For just $2.99 you can order a Kid’s pizza pack that consists of a personal pan pizza in a X-Men pizza box, One (of four) collector’s cups, an activity mat, and an X-Clusive X-Men comic (new issue every two weeks!). 

Around this time, the X-Men truly had a set of colorful characters brought to life by some amazing comic artists like Jim Lee, Andrew Wildman, Stephen Baskerville, John Herbet etc. that really made them stand out. From the logo to the backdrops and action poses…X-Men all came together and cemented the 1990s comic aesthetic many tried to duplicate. It’s a look and style that’s just so alluring to children and artists alike it’s no wonder why it was incorporated into toy, VHS, fast food, and trading card packaging. It just looked so intense and fresh. Personally I was never taken to a Pizza Hut unless it had to do with a Book It! coupon. And I was not aware of this promotion at the time. But I’d be lying if I said I didn’t just go to eBay and see if someone had a set of these cups to purchase. Because, in my reality, nothing broadcasts culture more than one sipping from a 27 year old plastic Beast cup. Who would’ve thought the X-Men paired as well with pizza as the Ninja Turtles did? 

Bram Stoker’s Dracula THE VIDEO GAME

Man, seeing this ad made me remember how Francis Ford Coppola’s Bram Stoker’s Dracula was everywhere. It truly was considered a “blockbuster” in its time. I recall seeing that “gargoyle” Dracula head plastered in every comic, magazine, billboard, bus stop and movie theater for months. I even spotted toys of Dracula in his red armor and “wolf” form at my local Suncoast video. But being in my “afraid of everything” phase there wasn’t a chance I was going to see this movie anytime soon. I didn’t find out there was a video game for it until ages later. And growing into a monster fanatic I had to play it. 

I remember it being about as “good” as the film. I don’t know what the general consensus of Bram Stoker’s Dracula is. I sat down thinking I was about to watch the ultimate Dracula film experience. And although the sets, costumes, and effects were all top notch…I felt pretty unimpressed when it ended. In the same vein (ha!) The game was nothing special either. The ad boasts “photo-realistic graphics” and “awesome soundtrack”. I’m sure they’re referring to the Sega CD version, while I only played the Super Nintendo game. The ad challenges me to “Play It If You Dare” and I suppose it did what Dracula is known to do…suck.  

There’s actually a better version of this game called Nosferatu released on the Super Nintendo in late 1995. I never heard about it until I ventured into emulating. The only negative is knowing I’m not playing as Keanu Reeves. That being said, the Dracula “gargoyle” head and title design still gives me the heebie jeebies. That’s great design work. Just wish the movie could’ve lived up to that. 

Well, that’s another installment of Ad Nauseum in the books. What’s that? You enjoyed that more than you thought you would? Well, you know what? I thought you just might. 

And you can always find articles on the remnants of comic culture right here on ChrisDoesComics. What am I talking about? Oh, you just let me worry about that. Just don’t forget to leave your empty sweet tea glass by the sink before you go. Pardon? Oh, that’s right, your ankle chain. Let me just grab the key.